When visiting new places on home exchange, being alert to cultural differences helps us ease into "life as a local". A quick search combining the terms "etiquette" or "customs" and the country you will be visiting can help the traveler avoid problems.
I tried my own advice by searching for answers to the question "are the French rude?" What I found on the internet was repetitive and shallow. It fell into these categories:
1) No, the French are not rude, even though somehow everyone outside of France perceives them that way.
2) If you speak French they will be nicer to you.
3) They are more reserved than people elsewhere.
4) Say "Bonjour" before asking a question.
Let's go to level two. Here is why the French are mean to you, and tips for making them love you instead. Actually, I lied. They are never going to love you. But you can understand them better. Here's how:
LEARN A FEW FRENCH PHRASES?
The reality is, the French are NOT delighted when you try to speak French, because you don't speak it very well. Unless you are French, that is, in which case you don't have to read this.
As soon as the average French person hears the accent on your "Bonjour" s/he is going to respond in English if at all possible. However, if you ask them "Do you speak English?" most French people will say "no" (or actually, "non"). The reason is they are drilled in school to speak their own language perfectly so they are often embarrassed to try to speak someone else's language if they are less than fluent. If you try to speak French and do an awful job they will feel more comfortable doing the same in your language.
CITY FOLK
One reason Americans think the French are rude is that visitors rarely venture outside the main French city of Paris. The general rule of thumb in the travel business is that 90% of the travelers visit only 10% of the destinations. Paris is not a broad exposure to French society. It is a big, crowded place with lots of people briskly going about their business. They don't have time to point out the way to the Eiffel Tower for the 17th tourist to ask that day. That is true of major cities world-wide.
FRENCH "SERVICE"
In France, employees are hired via contracts. The only way to get fired is to egregiously break the contract, kill someone, etc. In other words, it is hard to get fired. That means that everyone, from the college professor to the crepe flipper at the snack bar, has "tenure". They can be completely obnoxious and not get fired. Tipping is not common since businesses are required to pay a living wage. Therefore, less motivation exists to "go the extra kilometer".
In the US, if I have a problem with a service or item I can speak to another worker at the company to get the issue resolved. When I did the same thing in France, the reaction I received consistently made it clear that the employee felt s/he was being told the problem was due to his or her own actions, even if this was obviously not the case. I was repeatedly told to speak to the exact employee who had originally handled the transaction, even if that was impossible.
WORKING AROUND THE FRENCH
How do you get adequate service in France? More on that next time.
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